It still makes me sad.  I mean I'm not in the fetal position drooling kind of sad, but I wonder why she hasn't reached out to me. Why was she so supportive and pretty available before, but not now?  I can't imagine it was money, but maybe it's 'professionalism'?

I do pretty much like my new therapist C. I am different with her, atleast at the moment.  I'm open with many of my crazy thoughts but I don't expect so much from her as I did with L.  Maybe it's just too soon.

I foolishly have been reading some of my old journals.  I was in such pain for so long.  Today I read a little about my first few sessions with L.  I was pretty much attached to her from the start, and I knew it.

I'm not sure if I'm consciously keeping C at bay or is it just growth on my part, not needing to attach to her as desperately as I did with L.

Part of me misses the intensity, I think