Don't misunderstand though, I am still pissed at her leaving this week. How can I hold such opposing views? Although this morning I do feel a wee bit better. But is it cause she's safely home now? Or because maybe under getting a better understanding of this? Or both I suppose.
I don't like change either. I think maybe it's just change that I can't control? Interesting. Like I'm typically ok when I go away, but not when she leaves. I go crazy. This past week was particularly hard, and I'm not sure it was just Mark's death that pushed me nearly over the edge. That certainly didn't help, but it was her leaving. How embarrassing and shameful.
Her retiring, or moving is not her abandoning me. Hmmm.
Wonder how long I'll be able to believe this?