So I emailed Li.  It was only a couple of hours ago and I don't think I regret it, at least not yet.

It's been almost a year, can't believe it.  It sort of feels like you never existed, or maybe that's a defense mechanism.  I miss you, but you certainly have continued to hurt me.  Why would you tell me that we'd still have a relationship, why would you continuously reply to my occasional requests for contact in a supportive manner but never follow thru?  I just don't understand.  I still miss your hugs, but at the same time question there authenticity.  We did a lot of good work yet it left me with additional crap too.  Have been hoping to talk about this with you in person but trying to figure out a way to accept that this may never happen.

No response yet.  Could have so much more.  Was it ok to send?  Wish I could have really, really expressed my hurt and anger, but I guess that would have been wrong.